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At first, she believed that writing the book would be the end of her journey. But when someone suggested turning it into a community interest company, she knew the work was just beginning. She gave the organisation the same name - Be Kind, No Excuses - and quickly realised how urgent and necessary the mission was. After publication, women began approaching her, survivors who had never previously spoken out. That response made clear that the need for education and awareness was greater than she had anticipated.
Rie Pearson: Be Kind, No Excuses
Be Kind, No Excuses: Rie’s Mission to Prevent Domestic Abuse Before It Starts
After 27 years serving as a police officer specialising in domestic abuse, Rie had seen it all – from urgent call-outs in the early hours to supporting survivors through the court system. Working closely with organisations such as the Angelou Centre, she witnessed the reality of how abuse affects women and girls - especially those from marginalised and under-resourced backgrounds. On retiring from the police, she channelled her knowledge and experience into a book titled Be Kind, No Excuses, written to help girls recognise early warning signs of abuse in relationships.
From Book to Movement
Today, Be Kind, No Excuses is focused on early intervention - educating girls and, increasingly, parents on how to recognise red flags and break cycles of abuse before they start. During one session with parents, Rie asked who felt embarrassed talking to their children about sex and relationships. Around 90% of those present raised their hands. For her, it was further proof that too many families lack the confidence and language to address vital issues around relationships, consent and emotional safety.
She is now developing course content specifically for parents, aiming to open up these conversations in the home as well as in schools - to help normalise difficult but important conversations about safety, respect and boundaries.
Rie believes that the role of a parent is not to judge, but to safeguard, and that these discussions are vital for the future safety of our children.
Connecting with FIRST
Rie first discovered FIRST after picking up a leaflet at a networking event in Sunderland, which introduced her to the organisation’s self-employment courses and peer learning opportunities. She later attended FIRST’s Biz ‘N’ Bait networking event, themed around Courage, featuring talks by inspirational speakers Lauren Percy and Lisa Bean.
After the event, Rie was referred by a member of the FIRST team into two strands of additional support:
- The Enterprising North partnership, for help with accessing schools
- And to SMARTA, to support her in developing her business skills
These referrals were intended to give her the next level of guidance to expand her reach and grow the impact of her work.
Challenging Systems That Fail to Protect
Rie continues to highlight the systemic gaps in how domestic abuse is recognised and addressed - especially among young people. Abuse between individuals under the age of 16, for instance, isn’t legally defined as domestic violence due to the legal definition. Also, this links with the age of consent in sexually intimate relationships. As a result, these cases are excluded from official statistics. Girls in the care system are at particular risk, yet they often fall through the cracks of existing safeguarding processes.
In schools, she points out, the topic of abuse is rarely addressed in depth. While domestic violence may be briefly mentioned in PSHE, it’s typically not taught before age 14, and is often glossed over. Her long-term aim is to train teachers to understand the signs of abuse and give them the tools to educate pupils directly. Ultimately, she wants domestic abuse prevention embedded into the national curriculum - beginning earlier and taught more openly. Rie believes this must include protection and counselling services for teachers.
Growing Her Impact
Rie’s organisation currently offers a free online course, funded through WOW! Women Only Wellness Ltd events that she organises. These gatherings bring together female wellness professionals, as a business exhibition, who pay to host sessions - gaining new clients and media exposure while helping to fund Be Kind, No Excuses.
She also raises funds independently. From 1st July, she will begin a campaign to walk one million steps in 100 days - an awareness-raising challenge supporting her mission.
Her short-term plans include delivering her own workshops in schools and developing an audiobook version of her book. Long term, her vision is bold: to bring honest conversations about abuse into every school and onto the national curriculum as a meaningful tool to equip teenagers with the knowledge and confidence to protect themselves, and to challenge the silence that allows abuse to go unnoticed.
Through Be Kind, No Excuses, Rie is building a movement rooted in lived experience and early education. Her work is a call to action - not just to recognise abuse, but to actively prevent it.